2018年托福獨(dú)立寫作范文及解析（1）

　　People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

　　1. 題目翻譯：

　　人們上大學(xué)為很多目的， 比如有人為準(zhǔn)備工作經(jīng)驗(yàn)，有人為增長(zhǎng)知識(shí)。 你認(rèn)為人們?yōu)槭裁瓷洗髮W(xué)?

　　2. 審題關(guān)鍵詞：College/university; Why; Study/learn; Education

　　3. 論證分析：

　　正: We can learn lots of important knowledge when attending university.

　　正: University provides us pretty good opportunities to make more good friends.

　　正: University degree offers better jobs.

　　參考范文：

　　People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

　　People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons. I believe that the three most common reasons are to prepare for a career, to have new experiences, and to increase knowledge of oneself and the world around.

　　Career preparation is becoming more and more important to young people. For many, this is the primary reason to go to college. They know that the job market is competitive. At college, they can learn new skills for careers with a lot of opportunities. This means careers, such as information technology, that are expected to need a large workforce in the coming years.

　　Also, students go to colleges and universities to have new experiences. This often means having the opportunity to meet people different from those in their hometowns. For most students, going to college is the first time they’ve been away from home by themselves. In additions, this is the first time they’ve had to make decisions on their own. Making these decisions increases their knowledge of themselves.

　　Besides looking for self-knowledge, people also attend a university or college to expand their knowledge in subjects they find interesting. For many, this will be their last chance for a long time to learn about something that doesn’t relate directly to a career.

　　I would recommend that people not be so focused on a career. They should go to college to have new experiences and learn about themselves and the world they live in.

　　全文點(diǎn)評(píng)：

　　1. 本文是正正正的大正型支持文章，結(jié)構(gòu)標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，邏輯清晰。

　　2. 文章首段寫的非常標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，簡(jiǎn)單明了，并對(duì)下文的幾個(gè)正文段都用幾個(gè)詞組進(jìn)行了概括，縱覽全文。

　　滿分因素剖析

　　語(yǔ)言方面：

　　文章語(yǔ)言比較平實(shí)，論證恰到好處，沒(méi)有過(guò)多用來(lái)炫技的語(yǔ)句，很少有語(yǔ)法或邏輯錯(cuò)誤，讀起來(lái)清晰自然。

　　1. I believe that the three most common reasons are to prepare for a career, to have new experiences, and to increase knowledge of oneself and the world around.

　　此句中，believe后面引導(dǎo)賓語(yǔ)從句，that后面的內(nèi)容出現(xiàn)在及物動(dòng)詞后面，做主句的賓語(yǔ)，用來(lái)表達(dá)作者的看法和觀點(diǎn)。在結(jié)構(gòu)上，此句是文章開(kāi)頭段的最后一句話，承接上面作者提出的觀點(diǎn)，提出三個(gè)分論點(diǎn)，引出下文，是文章的邏輯與層次更加清晰。

　　2. In additions, this is the first time they’ve had to make decisions on their own.

　　此句出現(xiàn)在論證段落中，承接論證的上一個(gè)層次，引出論證的下一個(gè)層次。in addition是一個(gè)連詞短語(yǔ)，表示“此外，其次”，相同意思的還有additionally，furthermore，moreover, besides, also, what’s more。 在托�？荚囍�，考官非�？粗剡B詞的使用，因?yàn)檫@些詞往往可以文章的結(jié)構(gòu)和層次更加清晰，是論證更加有邏輯性。

　　3. Besides looking for self-knowledge, people also attend a university or college to expand their knowledge in subjects they find interesting.

　　此句中，Besides是一個(gè)介詞，后面接動(dòng)詞的ing形式，構(gòu)成介詞短語(yǔ)，意思為“除了...以外”。此句出現(xiàn)在文章第三個(gè)論證段的開(kāi)頭，besides引導(dǎo)的介詞短語(yǔ)可以承接上文，而主句可以提出本段的論點(diǎn)，這種銜接方式是文章更加流暢。Expand的意思是“擴(kuò)充，拓展”，expand knowledge表示“擴(kuò)充知識(shí)”。這種表達(dá)很形象，很生動(dòng)，比常用的“acquire, obtain”更有感染力，大家學(xué)習(xí)模仿這種表達(dá)。

　　結(jié)構(gòu)方面：

　　本文是一篇標(biāo)準(zhǔn)的五段論證結(jié)構(gòu)，開(kāi)頭一段，中間論證三段，最后結(jié)尾一段。論證部分采用正正正的大正論證結(jié)構(gòu)，段落鮮明，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰。開(kāi)頭部分開(kāi)門見(jiàn)山，出現(xiàn)了 prepare for a career, to have new experiences, and to increase knowledge of oneself and the world around.

　　這三個(gè)中間的分論點(diǎn)。作者在論證過(guò)程中用到很多鏈接詞，這樣是文章結(jié)構(gòu)緊密，邏輯清晰。最后一段收束全文，是文章渾然一體，看上去一目了然。